Bloom Where You are Planted!

Starting this blog has brought a serious issue to Light for me. When I first put it up in March of this year (2011), I had no church. I had no intention of even looking for a church. I knew what the church culture is in my area. I had found one a good distance away but with gas prices climbing, I did not think it worth it to make the trip once to three times a week. Doing Bible study by Skype was working when we could get together on the same day at the same time.

Now, I really like using the technology we have available to us for Bible study. Something was beginning to be amiss. It became apparent very quickly that it was being in the presence of other Christians. Skype has enabled me to continue studying with a minister that I enjoy and happen to be friends with. I love the fact that there is a televised buffet of church programming we can turn to. I love to listen to Joyce Meyer. I have recently discovered Beth Moore. Good stuff! But it is not the same as sitting in a pew next to a real sister in Christ that I can hold hands with if I need to. From television and video, you don't get the human contact from the 'fellowship' of hugging and shaking hands after the choir comes down (in some churches, I understand other churches do it differently). Human touch is important even if they don't fix their potato salad the same way you do!

So, now here was the Holy Spirit telling me I needed a congregation for my sake and the sake of my kids! Believe me, I did not want to hear that. Churches are messy and full of hypocrites and sinners! Is that not what you hear from everybody? If I had a dollar for every time I heard that from the mouth of Christian and non-Christian alike I would be a very wealthy woman. But it is just not good for a Christian to sit home alone. If you are able you need to get out with other Christians.
 
Church hunting is just not very much fun. That is my personal opinion, but one I think most share. Why do we do it? I do not know about other towns, but where I live there are two within throwing distance and one every couple of miles or so in any direction. My stomach literally gets into knots just thinking about going into any of them and being ignored by strangers who could care less about meeting me or getting to know me. Worse even, the thought that I might meet people who know my past, my history, and might hold it against me at best and at worst, are willing to gossip about me and shun me. Yeah, church hunting is not much fun. But when the Holy Spirit says do something, you just put that aside and go, right? Right. It took a couple of weeks for me to move on that one.

Just so you know, that whole church thing is biblical. It is not something just dreamed up to make money off the faithful (although that happens, sadly). If you need the reference it is Hebrews 10:23-32
²³Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful;
 ²⁴and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds,
 ²⁵not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near. 

The Holy Spirit is teaching me that any church will do.  What? I know, right? But yes, any church will do. They are ALL full of hurting, healing, loving, struggling people. Some clean up better than others. Some are further along their path to becoming like Jesus. Some have not yet realized they are supposed to be moving toward being like Jesus! They think they got saved from hellfire and that is it. They are done. Poor things just stopped right out of the gate.

Okay, here's the thing, their walk with Jesus is not any of your business except to encourage and help them. You are supposed to be in church to help them along, be a support for them. But how many of us look at church that way? How many of us get up and say, I'm going to go to so-and-so church and see if anybody up there needs my shoulder to lean on?

What do we do? We go to see if we like the singing. Is the preacher entertaining? Is their carpet a pretty color? Do they dress nice and smell pretty? We go for what we can get out of it. And I suppose that's a good thing if you are not very far along in your walk. I suppose it is okay to want those things. But can we get some folks who are going to see what needs to be done? Can we start going to see who needs to be loved? Who needs a ride to the doctor? the store? Who needs somebody to just visit with for a while so they remember they are human and loved?

I hate to step on any toes, but people, if you are going all the way across town for a good singing every week and passing up the place next door where there is some poor soul who could use your company every now and again, are you really being Jesus to the world? Are you being Jesus in the church, for that matter? Can I challenge you to reassess where you are and what you are doing? Are you doing it for God or are you doing it for you? Can I challenge you to start looking outside of you and your personal comfort and look to see if others need something? I promise you won't have to look long. Everybody okay at your church? Here's the biggie! Can I challenge you to go somewhere else and see if you can find someone that needs help, a shoulder, a friend?

And I do not mean to be ugly about it, but church has become 'sugar and cake'. Yeah, I am getting back around to it. I'll explain more about 'sugar and cake' and what I mean by that later.


But for now, ask yourself why you feel the need to travel all the way across town for a good singing when the church just up the road might be just as good. Maybe God needs you there for a little while. It isn't easy. I know. I am praying about two different churches right. One is doing quite well and seems to be growing. The other needs a lot of prayer, a new pastor, and maybe a swift kick in the ...well. The point is. The church is the church is the church. As long as we all agree on the big stuff, who cares about the little stuff?

You know, just bloom where you are planted, but always let the Holy Spirit be the one to plant you.

God is a gardener

God is so good.

Did you know bitterness will drive every person you know away from you? Even strangers will eventually get wind of your bitterness and run away. The Bible tells us that "the heart knows its own bitterness, and a stranger does not share its joy" (Proverbs 14:10) Understand, a bitter person will enjoy being bitter. They like being mean. I know I did. Years ago I worked at a hospital in Chattanooga, Tennessee. I know those poor nurses down at Erlanger just cringed whenever they saw my name next to their's on that big white assignment board. I was just awful. Having your child taken from you, being intimidated and bullied, even physically abused, will do that to you. It does not HAVE to do that, but it is a common reaction. I did not know at the time that I could choose to be something other than bitter. 
Bitterness grows from just a tiny little seed. It only takes a little hurt. Well, maybe a big hurt, but only one, and it will get dug in good and grow like wildfire. 


You see, bitterness is like a Yucca plant. Have you ever had to dig out a Yucca? Oh my goodness! A root of bitterness is very much the same thing: sharp, dangerous, stabbing blades that reach out into the world, jabbing you should you get too close. A Yucca plant has a root system that goes deep into the earth just like a root of bitterness hides deep inside your spirit, growing a vast network of new problem areas that will take considerable work and effort to cut out and destroy. 


I know that now. Now, that many relationships that could have been very close, loving ones are permanently severed, I know. 


I also know this:


Jesus gave us a very pointed directive to follow:
"and He answered, You shall love the Lord Your God with all your heart, and with all your souls, and with all your strength, and with all your mind, and love your neighbor as yourself."


That means everybody. The family friend that betrayed you and lied to you. The minister that did something you did not like. The grocery clerk that had a bad attitude. Your husband or wife that was really snappish this morning over breakfast. The terrorist that set off a car bomb half a world away. You don't have to make yourself accessible to them for hurt again. You DO have to forgive them and determine to walk in Love because you serve, if you are a Christian, the Master of Forgiveness. That is what we are supposed to be practicing. And it is a choice. The Bible is clear about that as well.


Ephesians 4:31 tells us to "Let ALL bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be PUT AWAY from you, along with all malice".
It is our choice to stop being angry and bitter. It is our choice to stop talking about people in a harmful manner. That can be a difficult one, too. I know. When I am at home cleaning up the breakfast mess and there is no one else in that kitchen but me, I let it fly. I catch myself in mid sentence a lot. Well, the Holy Spirit catches me in mid-sentence. If it were me, I'd go all day and into the night cussing a blue streak. We all do it. Don't even act like you don't. 
And we have to be vigilant about keeping it down, cutting it out, just like that bothersome Yucca plant that will shoot up again if we did not get all of it out of our ground. The book of Hebrews in chapter 12, verse 15 tells us we have to keep at it  (Hebrews 12:15) where it says " See to it no one comes short of the Grace of God; that NO ROOT of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled;".

I have a list of people that I need to forgive. It is not in my plans to set myself up for them ever again, but Jesus said I have to forgive them. Every single one of them. That does mean being civil to them and keeping my comments and thoughts in check with regards to them. Some of them I may have to come to a point where I can socialize with them again without getting too cozy. Not going to lie, I am not looking forward to it. Because they may never be aware that I have forgiven them, they will probably never change. Just because I forgive them does not guarantee a change in their behavior. Forgiveness does not require me to go to that person and tell them I forgive them. If I have wronged them I must ask forgiveness, but I do not need to, nor should I,  make the first effort after forgiving them to become buddies again. I think that the Holy Spirit knows that to do so would actually be counterproductive. Separation may be the only way that person who hurt you ever knows that they did something wrong. It is not. I may find out differently as I progress along this path of discovery, but for now that's where it stands. Boundaries are useful things. 


Bitterness can spread. It can cause many people to sin through gossip. If it is at all possible I have to learn to keep my mouth shut. I like to talk. Almost every photo ever taken of me has me with my mouth open and running about something or another. Keeping quiet is just not my thing. Hard lesson to learn! Unless it is a serious problem that could hurt others, I need to keep my mouth shut. I don't believe people should keep quiet about wife/child-beaters or child molesters or adulterers and I do not think God wants us to. If those kinds of sins are put to Light the sinner might repent and be healed of their problem. People get seriously hurt from those kind of sins. But that's a whole other blog...y'all do not want to get me started on rapists and adulterers...and I group them together for a reason. More on that later.



I do not see many Christians practicing Forgiveness even though they will praise Jesus' name on Sunday morning. I cannot let His name fall from my lips if I am not willing to make an attempt to let Him have my hurts and to Forgive all.

Are you a Christian? 

Do you practice Forgiveness? 

Are you holding onto grudges?

Why?


Jesus is the Master of Forgiveness..... and He can and will cut that awful Yucca plant out and plant a beautiful garden in your heart if you let Him.

Lessons off the Path

Talk about getting sidetracked! I know I promised my next post would be about 'sugar and cake', but something else happened that I had not planned. Something that God had planned happened instead and it was so much better than what I thought was a good idea.

The past month has been the busiest time of my life since I left the workforce over three years ago. But, I now have the opportunity to have my twelve year old son back with me, where he belongs, finally. God is so good. I have enjoyed shopping for his clothes, re-configuring my weekly grocery list and budget, and just watching him begin to adjust to chores and hanging out with the neighbor's children. You see, he did not have those things where he was before. A child needs these things.

God's Mercy is working in our lives in a huge way. I am so thankful for the time I have with him. I worry he may harbor resentment that Mom was not there all the time. He tells me he is happy though. He tells me he wants to be here. Most of all, he tells me and shows me that he loves me in too many ways to count. That keeps me going day-to-day when I have those thoughts that happen when we get discouraged or worried.

Last Sunday, I took the kids to a new (to us) church to visit. I am in the process of finding us a church home where we can settle into a community of believers. We went to Maple Grove Baptist church just a little way from the house. My father took me there once when I was a little girl, maybe six years old. I went to Vacation Bible School there when I was just a couple of years older than that. I don't remember exactly, it was a very long time ago.

It might be selfish of me, but I was pleasantly surprised when our helpful guide brought my son back into the sanctuary because the children church/ youth group only went through the fifth grade. He was going to have to share the pew with Momma! I could barely contain my tears of happiness through the service. My precious boy sat next to me and pulled my Bible over between us so he could read along , too. It was the first time we had ever sat together in church, the first time we shared a Bible and read it together.

I do not know if the Judge will allow me to keep him. But I do know it is in God's Hands. I know that My Judge in Heaven will determine the outcome and I must trust in that.

The past few weeks have really tested my resolve to Forgive as Christ has directed to do. I do not always feel forgiving towards my son's father. Ugly things have been said that make it so much more difficult to stay the course. Resolved to forgive regardless of outcome, I lean on My Savior Jesus, the Master of Forgiveness...and enjoying every single blessed moment I do have with my son.